Ordinary Lass Blog

Are you buying into the new year, new me hype? I’ve always been interested in self-development and I’m curious about goal setting at this time of year. Could we be setting ourselves up for failure if we over promise on our New Year’s resolutions? Or are we simply making positive, timely goals to maximise our happiness for the year ahead?

Let’s face it, it’s that time of year when our newsfeeds are encouraging us to become ‘better’. People making commitments to Dry January, Veganuary, signing up for gym memberships, weight loss plans and creating Vision Boards to manifest our dream lives. But what if de-Christmassing the house, tackling the washing pile and running errands is about as much as you can do at the moment? Sometimes it can feel like we’ve got too many tabs open. I guess it’s our job to figure out which tabs need to be open and which ones can be closed.

I can recall promises that I’ve made to myself over the years and wondered why some people manage to reach their goals but others can’t seem to make them stick.

Comfortable and familiar

Having stayed over at a friend’s house on NYE, Little Lass and I spent the morning with other families on New Year’s Day so January 1st was not a day to commit to a New Year, New Me ideal. It was more sociable, familiar and comfortable. No new health regime; I’d already eaten a few Lindt chocolate balls by 9am. Not a bad pre-appetiser to a bacon sandwich on white bread and a few cups of tea. The perfect breakfast.

That morning, I got the chance to ask other women (friends and fellow Mums) what their plans and goals were for the new year and was intrigued to hear that their goals. We talked about better hydration, consistency and learning to say no. It wasn’t the stereotypical ones I’ve made in the past about fad diets or unrealistic goals. I felt like everyone was meaningful and refreshingly realistic. I wondered if it’s because we’re of an age where we’re satisfied with ourselves or do we no longer feel that new year pressure? Is it that we haven’t got time for own goals because of our kids or is it because we’re more realistic these days about what we can achieve?

Unrealistic?

We’re now several days into January, my decorations have been taken down and are boxed up. Personally, I feel better that the decs are down and the house has had a good clean. My nails are still festive glittery red though and I’m not sure that I’m ready to return to work on Monday. It won’t surprise you to know that I haven’t signed up to a health regime – I wouldn’t know what to do with all this left chocolate and party food that still sits in the cupboard. In fact, I find it unrealistic for us all to assume that the Christmas alcohol, chocolate treats would all be consumed by the 1st January ready for us to start a new life? I wonder, would it matter if I decided to be healthier in the middle of January or even another month altogether?

What would happen if we broke a promise or resolution? Do we then give up entirely?

Or would we be kind enough to ourselves to value progress and overcome blips?

After all, the goals we set are ours to own; we can change them, adapt them or simply throw them away.

I think the key is not to compare ourselves to what others are doing. Give yourself permission to go at our own pace and do what genuinely feels right for you. In teaching, we look at progress within lessons but also progress over time – so ask yourself, does it matter when and how long it takes to achieve your goal? Or is it more important that it aligns with what you want for yourself regardless of how long it takes or what someone else’s idea of success is.

I’ve yet to meet someone who is 100% perfect, who is 100% fulfilled, 100% of the time.

So for me, going at my own pace is where I’m starting my new year.

What about you?